Friday 27 March 2009

Live Forever (Fly With Me) - Gym Class Heroes [They ROCK!!!]

Live Forever (Fly With Me) 

AWSOME song! I totally fell in love with this song the minit i heard it. The lyrics are really nyc too... Lyk in Cupid's Chokehold. I ben tatlly hookd on these guys! lol! I ben lisnin to their Album "The Quilt" + Cupid's Chokehold + Clothes off NOT STOP for a str8 week now! at home, in the car at school. my teachers are gettin fed up of tellin me to remove my headphones and my friends are complainin they cnt borrow my ipod anymor cuz i wont stop lisnin. lol! DAM! I'm too hookd! hahaha! Anyway, yea. the song. it's awsome! 

Song 
http://mp3-codes.com/?page=directory&do=search&query=Gym+Class+Heroes&pagenumber=4&id=75263 

Lyrics 
I see a window and all I can think about is 
Do you wanna fly with me? 
Do you wanna fly with me? 
I know it sounds crazy but I can't find solid ground so 
So do you wanna fly with me? 
So do you wanna fly with me? 

and i been starin at this window for the past 11 hours 
thinkin about all the opportunities this window has to offer 
from the 23rd floor to the filing cabinet east manhattan to 
FDR is beautiful as im watchin all the cars passin 
an a couple stars twinkle so i started laughin 
and a couple walked by an they looked so happy 
i booked this room at this place called the last resort 
all my bags are packed i got my jacket an my passport 
a first class ticket to the after life you dig me 
now is you is or is you aint with me 
and i fully understand if you got other plans 
but i can't see you hand in hand with another man 
i been on autopilot since we last spoke 
and i dont want to board this flight on a bad note 
i want you think about it but either way i'm goin 
an if you really love me then heres the chance to show it 

i see a window and all i can think about is 
do you wanna fly with me? 
do you wanna fly with me? 
i know it sounds crazy but i can't find solid ground 
so do you wanna fly with me? 
so do you wanna fly with me? 

we'll live forever, they'll write a novel about our love 

she looked me dead in the eyes 
and took me by the hand 
kissed me on the cheek an said "baby listen i understand 
you dont have to leave plus im scared of heights 
so just put down your luggage forget about this flight 
you and i, you know we been through a lot of things 
but its no reason to start trippin an arguing" 
she said "you are my king I place no one above you 
and I dont have to board a plane for me to show I love you 
and all this talk about the after life is kinda creepy 
so lets just go lay down and talk I'm gettin kinda sleepy" 
I kinda smiled and we both walked to the window I pulled it shut 
and started staring at the sky I wiped a couple tears away 
an then we looked at each other an 
I could see the stars twinkle in her eyes 
I told her about the couple I saw earlier 
she said "I'm sure they're cute but they're not you and I" 

i see a window and all i can think about is 
do you wanna fly with me? 
do you wanna fly with me? 
i know it sounds crazy but i can't find solid ground so 
so do you wanna fly with me? 
so do you wanna fly with me? 

we'll live forever, they'll write a novel about our love. 

i see a window and all i can think about is 
do you wanna fly with me? 
do you wanna fly with me? 
i know it sounds crazy but i can't find solid ground so 
so do you wanna fly with me? 
so do you wanan fly with me? 

we'll live forever, they'll write a novel about our love... 

Thursday 26 March 2009

What Now...?

What Now...?
By Margaret Nicolas Decena Alpajora
Thursday 26 March 2009 (0912h)

Smiling and laughing I
Feel disgusted at myself
Pretending and acting like nothing is wrong
My face portraying a person that
Doesn't exsist within my body
Abundant in Logorrhea on the surface
while inside I know it's taking all my energy
Draining my heart and my soul
Emptying my senses
But I wont stop hiding the
Shallow and unnecessary depression that is
Aching to burst out
But I wont let it happen
Not again
Not today
Not after everything everyone who cares about me
Has done for me
Has said to me
Disguising the tears
My inner hurt and confusion
Hidden behind a mask of false happiness
Fake smiles and heartless laughter
when really inside I'm broken
Dying and discintigrating
Into a corpse with no soul
A body with no emotion, feeling or heart
Becoming something
I never wanted to be
A monster within myself
Destroying the person I worked so hard to become
And promised I'd always be
The hurt from being thrown aside so suddenly
Like nothing but another peice of garbage
Cannot possibly compare to the mounting pain
Of knowing I've lost yet another friend
I've lost a part of me
I've lost my state of mind
The piercing ache from knowin
That I've lost myself
But I will go on
If not now, then later
And I will not stay down
Over and over I fall
I stumble and tumble and fail to take flight
But I always get back up
Even if it takes an eternity
I always get the last say on
what happens to me
What happens to my life
So I'ma Cry
I'ma hurt
I'ma scream and writhe in agony
But I know
That sooner or later
It's me that's gon have the last laugh
The last real smile
The last sincere truth
That's right
I'm gon have the last laugh

"HaHa!"
xoxoxoxoxox


Copyright (c) Margaret Nicolas Decena Alpajora, 2009 
26 March 2009

Tuesday 24 March 2009

Lost

Lost
By Margaret Nicolas Decena Alpajora
Wednesday 25 March 2009 (0821h)

Travelling within the cold shadows of my
Mind, I feel the damp chill of a
Stubborn heart, a stubborn girl
Difficulties fly at me one after the other
Piling and piling on top of one another
Cracking my spine as the load on my back gets bigger
Day to night the random mess
Flying around within my throbing head
With all my complex thoughts and mindsets
One might think this difficult life I live is
Nothing but hurt and misery
But no...
It is challenge to test human endurance
It is hidden strength waiting to be set free
It is life shaping and moulding me into someone
Who will make loved ones proud and be proud of them in return
Underneath the pain and tears
Is one of the strongest, wisest people I know
An understanding soul that suffers with you through your pain
And endures by your side always
Not because she is forced to
But because she wants to
Underneath the anger and troubles
Lies a heart that has been
Carelessly tossed around and broken so many times
But reassembled with passing time each time by the strength within
The scars always remaining
But not reminding of the pain and sudffering
But reminding of the experience and wisdom gained from it
A heart that loves and cares
No matter how many times it continues to get scarred
By those it cares most about
Most would think a person with so much
Betrayal and anguish within herself
Would be tired of the life she lives
But no...
These complexities and thoughts
My troublesome mindset
My ability to feel hurt
The emotions I show
That I'm always so open about
They make me who I am
They make me better
They make me see and understand that
Though I get diminished and worn out
By my own mind and emotion
I am better off than those who
Don't care who they are
Dont care how they are
Or how they live
Living without feeling
Living simply for living untill it's
Time for them to leave the planet and
Go into the forever-after we're all destined for
The reckless actions and
Uncaring lifestyle they hold
That's not for me
I Live for me
I live for those I love
I live a life that I want to
Remember always as it is
A full and fulfilling life that
Not only makes a difference to me but
Also to those I care about
Those I once cared for
And those I'm sure to care for in the future
All this leaves me with a
Small glint in my eye and a smile lingering on the edges of my lips
Behind the tears and sadness
That take over my face
Lies a sparkle
A face so true in itself
Showing confidence and a will to
Never be
Lost...

xoxoxoxox

Copyright (c) Margaret Nicolas Decena Alpajora, 2009 
25 March 2009

Wierd...

Wierd...
By Margaret Nicolas Decena Alpajora
Tuesday 24 March 2009 (2033h)

Wierd how I can feel
Hurt yet unhurt at the same time...
How I can
Cry but be surpisingly calm
While the tears flow down my face
And the slow thump of my heart speeds out of control
And deep slow breaths
Pass thorugh my lips sharp and fast...
Wierd how I
Feel so attached but strangely unattached...
How I
Want to let go but
Not let go of
Whatever it was we had,
We shared,
We cherished and despised...
Wierd that I feel like crying but
Feel like not cryin...
How I
Find myself refusing to accept this end but
Find myself easily accepting the end while
Tear by tear,
Drop by drop,
Slowly the salty water caresses my burning cheeks
And falling lightly off my face
Slowing down through time as they
Travel to the ground and
Disapear on the floor
With the rest of the tears I've cried over the years while
A small glint of a smile lingers on the
Ends of my lips and a glint of mystery and
Adventure sparkles in the depth of my
Shining teary eyes...
Its wierd
That I can feel like I've been
Ripped in half
But still feel fixed at the same tym
And I seem to
Hold tight but move on all at once...
Wierd how I laugh and smile in front of you
When inside I know I'm crying,
Inside im dying...
Wierd how
I loved you as my friend
Liked you as a lover
And fear you as new part of my past...
Wierd how I
Wanna keep talking to you but
Not want to for fear of the
Akwardness that surely will follow...
Wierd that
I cant feel myself breathing,
That i want to stop
But don't ever want to stop
Wierd how my
Senses are taking over
But gradualy fading away
Making me feel like
A great burden has been thrust upon me
But lifted at the same time...
Wierd how I feel
So good
But so bad,
So Happy
Yet so sad,
So hurt
But so free...
All this
All at once...
This wierd feeling,
These wierd thoughts,
This pile up of multiple insyts,
This ease,
This unease,
This justice to unjustice,
This fear of fear,
This backfire of care,
This decite to decite,
The strange and alien world I'm in
That feels so familliar and so like home,
How used to it I am
That I'm no longer used to it...
How I
Expect things to go how I dont expect things to go...
Wierd,
So wierd,
How wierd things are when things aren't wierd
But how wierd they are when they are...
Wierd how
I like you but
I cant stand you yet
I wanna be with you
Cuz when I'm not with you I
Feel so empty
Yet when I'm with you I
Still feel lyk something is missing
Yet everything's there
And everything's in place...
So wierd, so...
I'm gonna say goodbye to goodbye
And say hello to the
Wierd new world that I've
Just enterd for the very first time
That i've lived in for so so long...
Wierd how
The wierd thing is
Without this wierd
Things would be so wierd...
So ima be wierd
While waiting for you to be wierd with me and
To see that this is just so wierd
And so unperfect but
All too perfect all at once...
I never expected you to be perfect and
I never expected us to be perfect cuz
I'm anything but perfect so
I'ma say FUCK YOU to perfect
And welcome unperfect into my heart...!

Now...
Isn't that wierd...?
xoxoxoxox


Copyright (c) Margaret Nicolas Decena Alpajora, 2009 
24 March 2009